How Can I Keep From Singing?

Day twenty-two: A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.

        I do not have the capacity to voice words that adequately express my feelings for my Savior, but I know that I cannot truthfully write about this day post without trying to express them.
        The Savior has not only gotten me through the most in my life, He has gotten me through everything in my life.  He is my greatest friend.  I would be nowhere without His love, comfort, strength, support, and guidance.  He has never left me alone.  He has gone through so much and sacrificed everything for me so that I would be able to succeed.  Being a member of His true and living church on the earth today has brought me the most peace, joy, direction, meaning, beauty, strength, and happiness than anything else in the entire world.  I know wholeheartedly that I would be lost in misery without the knowledge of these sacred truths.  Jesus the Christ has given me everything and it is through Him that I will continue to make it through everything else.  Truly, no storm can shake my inmost calm.

              Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

More Than Biologically Related

Day twenty-one: A picture of someone you miss.

Let's expand this to the two people I miss:  Courtney Poulsen and Danielle Warnick.
     From Logan to Orem to St. George, we span the state of Utah.  Coming from a family of all boys, these two gorgeous women are the closest thing to my biological sisters.  And when you are as close to your cousins as I am, seeing them a few times a year is not enough.
     From the simple childhood days of slumber parties, fashion shows, and Mary-Kate and Ashley movies, to growing up and facing boy problems, bad-hair days, and changing friendships, they've always been there for me.  Through every shopping trip, Park City getaway, and family reunion, we've got good times coming till the end of it all.
     Here's to you, women.
                                LDC for life.

So Long Sweet Summer

Day twenty: A picture of someone who has made a huge impact on your life recently.

      Have you ever wanted a best friend that you can talk to about anything in the entire world for hours on end?

     What about someone who you know will be there for you every step of the way, no matter what?

     A person who never ceases to make you laugh so hard your stomach hurts, even when there's tears streaming down your face?

     Maybe you'd like someone whose smile was contagious, and whose positivity made you feel like you have every reason in the world to be happy--because you do.

     On top of all this let's add someone who tells the best stories, gives the best advice, accepts you wholly for who you are, and makes sure you're always heading where you want to go in life--even if sometimes you forget.

Well, then I think you're looking for someone named DJ.

Whilst In Sienna, 2009

Day nineteen: A picture of your favorite book.

     Like the Flowing River, by Paulo Coelho.
I actually stumbled upon this book as I was drifting down the cobblestone streets of Sienna, Italy.  I wandered into a little bookshop and, through nothing that could be called coincidence, my eyes fell upon its title.  The next thing I knew I was sitting on a little brick wall in the middle of the town's square, surrounded by  people speaking Italian, enjoying gelatos, and happily strolling down the flowered alleys, reading a book that must have been written just for me.
     The book is a collection of thoughts, reflections and short stories from Coelho's own life.  Coelho is an incredible, world renowned Brazilian author who has traveled everywhere on the earth.  His life is incredible--he's lived so many places, experienced so many things, spoken in front of so many different audiences, connected with so many different people, and yet he still sees the simple majesty, priceless lessons, and tiniest miracles wherever he goes.  I love it because all of these short messages are real, true experiences and reading them helps me to see life in a different, brighter light.  His writing is beautiful, poetic, understandable, relate-able, and enjoyable.  It's full of incredible life wisdom, and yet it's so simple.  If I had could transform my personality into a book, this would be it.

One quote out of my countless favorites:  "While separating the wheat from the chaff, and not allowing ourselves to be discouraged by the enormous number of charlatans in the world, I think we should ask ourselves again: what are we capable of?  And then, quite calmly, go off in search of our own immense potential."

If you're looking for a short, easy read that will bring you happiness, further open your eyes to the beauty of the world, and help you be a better person, this is my formal recommendation.

Coming Home, 2011

Day eighteen: A picture of your day.

Let's pretend I'm posting this on Saturday.  Okay?  Okay.
Ahh, homecoming!  Utah State, my heart will always lie with you.

My day on Saturday was perfectly prepared by an eventful Friday night, camping out on the Quad with some wonderful new friends as well as breaking the world record for the longest kissing chain.  You know us Aggies and our kissing ;)

And then came Saturday.  A great morning with time to get some good soul searching in, going to the USU Bookstore to get game day t-shirts, pre-game BBQ picnic out in the sunshine, homecoming game with my best friend, neighbors, and roommates, and finally the homecoming dance followed by late night ice-blocking with great company.

These are my days in Logan, Utah.

It's Indie Rock & Roll For Me

Day seventeen: A picture of your favorite band or artist.

The Killers.  Dave Keuning, Mark Stoermer, Ronnie Vannucci, and Brandon Flowers.  My love for this fabulous indie-rock band first caught aflame junior year thanks to Wendy Kimble, the beginning to a love story of which I will never cease to adore.  I can't say it better than her own Killers post.  Their four albums (Hot Fuss, Sam's Town, Day & Age, and compilation album Sawdust) are some of the most diverse, original, and incredible collections of songs ever.  They bring something to my life, something that makes my indie heart sing.  And no matter how much my music tastes change, the Killers will always reside.

 "Glamorous indie rock and roll is what I want, it's in my soul--it's what I need.  Indie rock and roll, it's time."

Whoops.

Day sixteen: A picture of something you wish you could forget.

I wish I could forget embarrassing moments!  Not the kind that really taught you something and helped you realize how to better handle situations, but the ones where you were seriously just being an idiot, made a total fool of yourself (in a way that wasn't even comical) and now it's forever stuck in your memory.  These experiences don't benefit anyone in any way-- begone, red-faced moments of the past!

I once saw a picture with the words:
"Remember that one time when you did that one thing that was really embarrassing?
              Yeah, no one else does.
Get over it!"                                                                 Words of wisdom.

Learning the Language of the World

Day fifteen: A picture of something you want to do before you die.

I desperately, wholeheartedly want to be fluent in another language.  I don't care what language (though preferably Italian,) when I learn it, or how long it takes me-- only that I'm fluent before I die.
I want to be beyond a uni-lingual, typical, white American from Utah.  I want to be a citizen of the world. :)

"...True Poets, They Who Are Seers, Seek to Express the Universe in Terms of Music."

Day fourteen: A picture of something you wish you were better at.

MUSIC.  The thing I most wish I was better at is playing musical instruments.  I play piano, I'm picking up the ukulele, and I played some guitar for awhile but now it just feels huge and awkward in my hands compared to my uke.
But I'm just average.  And I want to be, "Daang.  That girl has got some serious talent."

I feel like a part of me is lacking, or is not fully developed...like I can't fully express myself yet.  Ideally, I would be proficiently awesome at playing the

• Piano
• Ukulele
• Guitar
• Drums
• Harmonica
• Tambourine (Does that really even count?)
• Harp
• That small flute-ish instrument like from Lord of the Rings

Yeah.  Pretty much.  And no, that's not unrealistic.  I'll get there.  Even if it's not until the millenium.  :)

"Music is the purest form of art...therefore true poets, they who are seers, seek to express the universe in terms of music... The singer has everything within him.  The notes come out from his very life.  They are not materials gathered from outside."  ~Rabindranath Tagore Indian poet, playwright, and essayist; won Nobel Prize for Literature in 1913  

Endings

Day thirteen: A picture of something you wish you could change.

           There are a lot of things that I wish I could change.  I wish I could change the world into a better, peaceful place where people simply believed in being good.  I wish I could change my height, the cost of gas, the media, and how long the Autumn season lasts.

      But today--today is different.  Today I wish I could change endings.

      You see, everyone's life is a story.  (Hence the blog title.)  And everyone's story consists of many different chapters.  Some chapters are long, some are short, some are sweet, some are sad.  Everyone's chapters vary, spanning a wide range of painful, trying, scary, lonely, to infatuating, lovely, peaceful, exciting, or joyous.  Every reach of emotion these chapters touch is essential and important.  Opposition and trials are indeed a great blessing, and that is not ever something I wish I could change.

      But the endings.

      What about the chapters that close in a way that is so unsatisfying that you can't possibly make sense of it?  What about the chapters where the main character in your life suddenly walks away, only to be glimpsed here and there as a total stranger, and you never found out what really happened, or how things might have been different if times had only been.... What?  If they had only been what?  That's the problem--you don't know.  And of course you will continue on with your story, searching inward for some self-made closure, learning from it what you can and beginning anew, where happiness will be waiting for you just around the corner.

      But there is still that tiny little part of you that yearns for the hidden story, wondering why things happened the way they did, what compelled that person to act in such a way, if things could have been different if you had acted more maturely, if your ending was really how it was supposed to turn out, etc.

      In some cases, these questions will be soothed further in the future when you will look behind you and understand the purpose and necessity behind these things.

      But some will not.  The fact still remains that at that moment-- the moment when you came to realize that things have changed and you must close a chapter that was so much a part of you and claimed so much of your heart, never to open it again-- that it was an ending that made your heart sad.

      And that is what I wish I could change.

The Source of Awesomeness

Day twelve: A picture of yourself and a family member.

I'm pretty sure this picture is self-explanatory as to the nature of my relationship with my brother.

Ten Reasons Why Ryan Kasparian is the Source of Awesomeness

1. He's 13 years old and can grow a scary good mexi-stache.

2. He's pro at pwning all the newb-lets at Star Craft.

3. He can never take a picture without pulling an abnormal facial expression.  (At least, not that I know of.) 

4. He has a shirt that reads, "What? I can't hear you over the sound of my AWESOMENESS!"
5. We dominate at team Mario Kart. 

6. He's already way talented at composing some sick-rad original songs on the piano.

7. Whenever I come home from college, he walks in and states with a straight face, "Sister."  Then he proceeds to do whatever else he was doing previously.

8. You will hear the word "Sp-gowsh" (or something of that sort) at least once a day.

9. He has a legitimate afro.

10. He's one of the nicest kids you will ever meet.

Here's to you, brosef :) 

Journeys

Day eleven: A picture of something you love.

Certainly, travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living.  ~Miriam Beard

TRAVELING.  The world.  The open road.  The adventure.  The serenity.  The expanse of human experience.

What more can I say than quote the great words of those before me?

The following is two stanzas of a 15 stanza poem by Walt Whitman.  The whole poem is absolutely fabulous.  It is my favorite poem-- if you can spare five to ten minutes, fulfill your quota of great, classic literature for the day and read the rest.        

Song of the Open Road

BY WALT WHITMAN

Afoot and light-hearted I take to the open road,

Healthy, free, the world before me,

The long brown path before me leading wherever I choose.

Henceforth I ask not good-fortune, I myself am good-fortune,

Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing,

Done with indoor complaints, libraries, querulous criticisms,

Strong and content I travel the open road.

The earth, that is sufficient,

I do not want the constellations any nearer,

I know they are very well where they are,

I know they suffice for those who belong to them.

(Still here I carry my old delicious burdens,

I carry them, men and women, I carry them with me wherever I go,

I swear it is impossible for me to get rid of them,

I am fill’d with them, and I will fill them in return.)

The earth expanding right hand and left hand,

The picture alive, every part in its best light,

The music falling in where it is wanted, and stopping where it is not wanted,

The cheerful voice of the public road, the gay fresh sentiment of the road.

O highway I travel, do you say to me Do not leave me?

Do you say Venture not—if you leave me you are lost?

Do you say I am already prepared, I am well-beaten and undenied, adhere to me?

O public road, I say back I am not afraid to leave you, yet I love you,

You express me better than I can express myself,

You shall be more to me than my poem.

Continued at http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/178711

Further Linkage to Fun Traveling Tips:  Nomadic Matt's Travel Site

How to Travel the World Part One: http://www.nomadicmatt.com/travel-blogs/how-to-travel-the-world-part-1-pre-trip/
How to Travel the World Part Two: http://www.nomadicmatt.com/travel-blogs/how-to-travel-the-world-part-2-on-the-road/

Goodbye, Social Life

Day ten: A picture of something you hate.

How fitting, as it is the first day of class and I already feel completely overwhelmed by the amount of homework that I am going to have this semester.  You know, some college professors can be absolutely ridiculous.  Rant rant rant.  I hate homework.  And yet I am of my own free will choosing to spend thousands of dollars just to be given this homework in the first place.  Talk about irony.

Life Ain't Life Without Laquisha

Day nine: A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.

Dear Wendy Kimble,

Floating on logs, tin-foiling cars, sneaking pizzas into movie theaters, creating fake husbands, road trips, saran wrapping, making T-shirts with nail polish, laughing like ugly men, blanket fort sleepovers, water parks, Brandon Flowers, hair dying parties, car chases, concerts, chairs in the hot tub, Winger's chicken, wash-off wrist tattoos, the Killers, cardboard cut-outs....
Where would my life be without you?

Shaniqua and Laquisha, soul sisters forever!
Because I don't shine if you don't shine.  <3

There's Nothing Like A Fresh Breath of Demotivation

Day eight: A picture that makes you laugh.



Bahahahaha.  Let's be honest.



http://despair.com/viewall.html

The Iron Rod

Day seven: A picture of your most treasured item.

You know that question they always ask you in elementary school, "If your house were on fire and you could only grab three of your possessions, what would they be?"

                                 How do you really answer that at age 10?

Gameboy?  Favorite shirt?  Clumsily made scrapbook?  Wallet containing exactly seven dollars and 68 cents?

     Well, at age 19 I can finally answer that question with no doubt in my mind.  Amid clouds of smoke and rising flames, without a heartbeat going by I would grab my scriptures, my journal, and the stuffed animal I've had since I was a baby.  (I know, "ha ha--" okay, it means a lot to me!)  

This genuine leather, highlighted and underlined, glinting gold book means the world to me.  It couldn't be described better than as my most treasured item.

"...Come up hither to hear the pleasing word of God, yea, the word which healeth the wounded soul."  Jacob 2:8

My Alter-Ego

Day six: A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day.

Emma Watson.  First, she's beyond gorgeous.  Second, she has a British accent.  Who wouldn't want to be beyond gorgeous and have a British accent?  Not to mention live in Europe, have huge piles of money, and have a second stage-identity as a witch at Hogwarts?  

Dear Emma,

Let's trade.  Just for one day.
Sincerely,

The person living an average life in Bountiful, Utah.  

The Love of Life Itself

Day five: A picture of your favorite memory.

Cousins, adventuring in caves, no make-up and no cares, sharing stories, laughs, and love on a bright spring-break day.  That sounds like favorite memory material.  :)

But how can you really choose a favorite memory?

                         Just one?

What would such a thing be made up of?

Family, friends, laughter,

             Excitement, adventure, fun,

                       Simplicity, happiness, meaning?

A favorite memory would be warm, nostalgic; a reminder of the good things in life, a thought that makes you smile and count your blessings.  Would it not?

              Or maybe it would be short, simple, like the moment you realized that you were really in love with your best friend, or the time you won your first medal for dance.

      Maybe it would be your first kiss, first sunrise, or first concert,        

               Or your last day of childish freedom, last bite of that heavenly dessert, last goodbye to an old friend.

The best thing about a memory is that it is yours--preserved in your mind, etched in your heart, told in your words.

My favorite memory is all-encompassing.  It is a combination of good food, good times, good music, and good company.  It is the evening fire with the family by the beach, the long talks with an old friend on the bench outside, the beauty of the view from the top of the mountain, the recognition of a love far greater than yourself.  It is powerful yet simple, exists all around yet solely in your heart.  It is love and acceptance, contentment and happiness.  My favorite memory is life itself.   

Further Improvement Needed

Day four: A picture of a habit you wish you didn’t have.

Consciously and unconsciously, day in and day out, I compare myself to others.  Almost a tragic habit--common yet unseen, unproductive, and unhealthy.

So, what shall we do?

Perfect advice from a Zen blog:

http://zenhabits.net/lifes-enough-stop-comparing-yourself-to-others/

Breaking the Habit of Comparing Yourself With Others

So how do you break this cycle of comparing yourself with others? Here are some tips I’ve found useful:

• Awareness. Most often we do these social comparisons without realizing we’re doing it. It’s a natural act, I suppose, and as a result it’s something that is done without consciousness. So the solution is to become conscious — bring these thoughts to the forefront of your consciousness by being on the lookout for them. If you focus on these thoughts for a few days, it gets much easier with practice, and soon it’ll be hard not to notice.
• Stop yourself. Once you realize you’re doing these comparisons, give yourself a pause. Don’t berate yourself or feel bad — just acknowledge the thought, and gently change focus.
• Count your blessings. A better focus is on what you do have, on what you are already blessed with. Count what you have, not what you don’t. Think about how lucky you are to have what you have, to have the people in your life who care about you, to be alive at all.
• Focus on your strengths. Instead of looking at your weaknesses, ask yourself what your strengths are. Celebrate them! Be proud of them. Don’t brag, but feel good about them and work on using them to your best advantage.
• Be OK with imperfection. No one is perfect — intellectually, we all know that, but emotionally we seem to feel bad when we don’t reach perfection. You aren’t perfect and you never will be. I certainly am not, and I’ve learned to be OK with that. Sure, keep trying to improve, but don’t think you’ll ever be the “perfect person”. If you look at it in a different way, that imperfection is what makes you who you are, you already are perfect.
• Don’t knock others down. Sometimes we try to criticize others just to make ourselves look or feel better. Taking someone else down for your benefit is destructive. It forms an enemy when you could be forming a friend. In the end, that hurts you as well. Instead, try to support others in their success — that will lead to more success on your part.
• Focus on the journey. Don’t focus on how you rank in comparison to others — life is not a competition. It’s a journey. We are all on a journey, to find something, to become something, to learn, to create. That journey has nothing to do with how well other people are doing, or what they have. It has everything to do with what we want to do, and where we want to go. That’s all you need to worry about.
• Learn to love enough. If you always want what others have, you will never have enough. You will always want more. That’s an endless cycle, and it will never lead to happiness. No matter how many clothes you buy, no matter how many houses you own (seven, in the case of one famous candidate), no matter how many fancy cars you acquire … you’ll never have enough. Instead, learn to realize that what you have is already enough. If you have shelter over your head, food on the table, clothes on your back, and people who love you, you are blessed. You have enough. Anything you have over and above that — and let’s admit that all of us reading this blog have more than that — is more than enough. Be good with that, and you’ll find contentment.
  

Patrick Jane, My Secret Love

Day three: A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

The Mentalist on CBS. It's the perfect combination of captivation, humor, drama, characters, ingenuity, and story. I started watching Season One at the end of May.  I'm almost finished with Season Three.  Enough said.  

Only The Best Roommate Ever

Day two:  A picture of you and a person you've been close with for awhile.

This beautiful catch of a roommate is nothing short of amazing.  There's no other way to put it.  She's probably the most sincere, caring, gorgeous, fun, happy, real, and freakin' hilarious person on the earth.  She's a true friend in the highest sense.  You'll never be around her without catching her contagious smile or laughing so hard your stomach hurts.  There's never a boring moment, either--something eventful is always underfoot.  She's beyond a best friend, she's the sister I've never had and would never change for anything in the world.  Love you, Als!

30 Days of Introduction

Day one:  A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.

1. I love the color white.
2. I can't stand wearing jeans on Sundays.
3. One of the hardest things for me to do is say goodbye.
4. Sometimes I secretly wish I could live my life as a wood nymph, singing enchanted melodies and tip-toeing around mystical forests with leaves laced in my hair.  :)
5. I absolutely love being the middle child.
6. Thanks to my brothers, there will always be a special place in my heart for Strong Bad Emails.  Sewiously!
7. If I could be anywhere in the world it would be in the little mountain towns of Switzerland.
8. I thoroughly enjoy yoga and meditation.
9. The only two things I don't like about Utah are a) Autumn never lasts very long, and b) There are never enough thunderstorms.
10. I'm a quarter Armenian.
11. I ridiculously adore high heels, but hardly ever wear them because they make me too tall.
12. Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints means everything in the world to me.  I know it's true and it is the source of all my strength, love, hope, happiness, and direction.
13.  Music is one of my passions.
14. My dream item to own would be a private jet, so that the whole world would be at my fingertips :)
15. I believe it's best to live with an open and passionate heart, even though it makes one vulnerable.
              "Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."

Of June, 2011

Sunsets.  Sandy Toes.  Ukuleles.  Sunglasses.  Family.  Friendship.  Music.  Reminiscing.  Flickering fires.  Dancing.  Cocktail Umbrellas.  Candlelight.  Pictures.  Memories.  Love.  Mocktails.  Gatherings.  Facing Fears.  Running-Through-the-Field-of-Daisies Dress.  Warmth.  Laughter.  This is Life as a Love Story.