Sunlight

Day twenty-six: Something that makes you smile.

That moment, right before the sun starts to set, when the light hits the mountains and the world just seems to pause in a faint, shimmering glow; when time seems to stop for just a split second and in that moment everything is well, there is no hurt, and the world is pure and beautiful.
     It is in that tender mercy that I cannot help but smile, and it is in that smile that my countenance is not only changed but my soul is lifted.  I remember the beauty of the small things and the joys of an untainted life--of a world that is pure and timeless, where all things are just as they were meant to be.  And in that quiet moment as I pause to look at those golden hillsides, beaming with steadiness, truth, and brilliance, I once again believe that somewhere deep down within this corruptible world, a place of stillness still exists.  <3

Fears

Day twenty-five: Something you're afraid of.

Well, let's see.  Spiders.  Heights.  Creepers hiding under my car waiting to grab my leg.  You know, the usual stuff.  Surface. Common.

Then, we dig deeper.  Losing people.  Regrets.  Unfulfilled potential.  Pain.  Failure.  Being betrayed by someone who once promised that their love for you would never cease.

You see, my fears are not just fears.  They are heartaches, longings, sadnesses...They are my soul looking back on what I wish I could change and preparing myself for a future that inevitably holds more pain.  They are a solemn stillness and a resignation to life, knowing that difficulty will never truly cease.

But, while my fears may be many, there is one thing I do not fear: abandonment.

And so, while I sometimes wade through fear's dark caverns, I know that I will never be alone.  I will never be lost.  I will never be abandoned.  These fears are too much to carry on my own, but I was never left to do this on my own.

And this one little grain of faith buries all my fears deep down within me.  They still exist, but often times they lie dormant and do not threaten me.  I am free to embrace opportunities, to live openly, to improve, to love, to exist. I can face all situations with courage and trust, knowing my foundation and who it is that walks beside me.

No, I may not be brave on my own just yet.  But I am learning.  And as my foot steps along the pathway of faith, I will get there.

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear." ~Ambrose Redmoon